Write a letter

Is your dad telling you to stop crying and toughen up? How do you get him to listen?

Write a letter

Postby koolkat » Mon Apr 16, 2012 1:49 pm

Sometimes when you get into a conversation as a child with an adult it can be intimidating when you want to talk about something important. You may freeze and not say the things that are on your mind or be unclear on what your point is. I know that my dad was very difficult to talk to when he was angry because I would be frightened to say anything that might make him even more angry. When he would get like this I would write him a letter. The letter allowed me to take my time and choose my words very carefully. This way I didnt worry about looking him in the eye and feeling nervous to tell him how I really felt. If your father has been hard on you about being a wuss or crying too much then sit down and write out in detail what it is you feel when he calls you bad names. Make sure that he knows how you feel and maybe he will listen to you then. Good luck :)
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Re: Write a letter

Postby Sherbert » Thu Apr 19, 2012 3:34 pm

This is a good one! Do it hand written too so he can feel like it is more personal for him. I think every day wants to do the right thing and knows the right thing hurts their kids feelings sometimes. It is part of being a good parent so when you decide to open up to your dad dont tell him he is doing everything wrong explain you know he loves you but you wish he would do things a little different. If you get to negative he might shut down and refuse to help because he misunderstands you. Remember to point on he is not wrong just what he is doing you dont agree with and even come up with your own solution and see how it feels about it.
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Re: Write a letter

Postby anyname09 » Fri Apr 20, 2012 2:11 pm

This is a GREAT way at confronting a touchy situation. I agree, a child confronting an adult is a VERY intimidating moment, I know from experience. A sincere letter addressing a specific issue shows maturity and responsibility and any father in his right mind would head his pride and listen to his child.

With that being said, whining about being called a "wuss" is the least of anyone's true issues. It really has to be a situation where he is deliberately belittling you in front of your friends or people you hold close to you. Being called a "wuss" is not belittling in the least. In this case, just ignore it and go be a KID!
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Re: Write a letter

Postby Coached » Mon Apr 30, 2012 4:27 pm

Parents can only try their best and when their best in not good enough dont blame it on yourself. You can only be you so if you dont become the person that they want then just dont let it bother you. Being called a wuss by your dad im sure is a bit awful to hear but its not the end of the world. If you explain in a letter to your dad saying im ready for whatever you think I deserve but im not going to do what you want at my expsense anymore. I am not you and you are not me so if you dont like who I am then im sorry but I am just living my life. I dont see how any dad reading something like that wouldnt take you seriously and get thet he is not helping but hurting you.
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Re: Write a letter

Postby orthodox » Tue May 22, 2012 1:06 pm

I would take this a step further, just stand in front of your dad with the paper and read it out loud without taking your eyes from your letter until you are finished. Even if it is difficult to get the words out that will be what helps your father uderstand. You dont want to be called a wuss by your dad because all of the kids at school do that already. Explain that you need a dad that can teach you without hurting your feelings. Your voice is what he should hear but when you write it down first you will not forget anything important because of your nerves.
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Re: Write a letter

Postby Rowland » Tue Jul 03, 2012 11:42 am

This will work because when men read something that is heartfelt they have a better time accepting it because they can express their feelings while looking at the paper.When you speak to them they might shut down because they dont want to get emotional and not give the best response should give.
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Re: Write a letter

Postby Appealing » Mon Aug 06, 2012 3:08 pm

When you write your feelings its amazing how much it flows on the paper when you get on a roll.You feel like you can say anything because nobody is giving you weird looks and interupting you.Not only is it helpful to get your message out but its theraputic to get all of that raw emotion out of your head and on paper at once.
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Re: Write a letter

Postby Cowabunga » Mon Jan 14, 2013 12:23 pm

Letters allow thoughts to be expressed without interuption.Usually you get your point across but if they dont like your message they can just ignore it and you will not be able to see their reaction and know if they understood or not.
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Re: Write a letter

Postby Rooftops » Tue Jan 29, 2013 10:10 am

Dont focus on what you dont like in the letter but pay more attention to where you would like the future to be for you realtionship. Explain how you love them and only want to be positive because you value your relationship. Take it very seriously and so will your Dad.
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Re: Write a letter

Postby bigGULP » Mon Feb 04, 2013 4:36 pm

Rowland wrote :
> This will work because when men read something that is heartfelt they have
> a better time accepting it because they can express their feelings while
> looking at the paper.When you speak to them they might shut down because
> they dont want to get emotional and not give the best response should give.

Writing helps get out what you need to say and dont have the strength to verbalize it.
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