Willow Nevermore
Bullying Survivor
Female | San Diego, CA   United States
how i survived bullying at home and at school
Bullying Type: Physical / Emotional
Posted By: Willow
7/10/12 4:17 PM
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well my story starts off kind of normal. just the typical bullying when i was a child. but at home i was being be*ten and sexually *********ed by my father. around the same time, my grandfather shot himself in the head on my mothers birthday. to this day i do my best to make her birthday extra special so she doesn't have time to remember that horrific phone call. at school i was made fun of because i was tall, overly skinny, and i dressed different. i was never one to wear skirts or revealing clothing. because of this i was called names. as i got older, i started to develop sooner and faster than most girls. i began wearing more baggy clothing. finally i started to shave my head. as i entered junior high, the bullying began to get physical. i was pushed in the locker room while getting ready for PE and i was be*t up between classes. towards the end of my 7th grade year, someone told the principal i brought a gun to school. they checked all of my stuff and found no weapons, but kicked me out of school anyways. i was shortly after put into a psych ward for a suicide attempt. once i was released, i was put into a different school. my mother would constantly fight me every morning to get me to go to school. in elementary school it was the guidance counselor who would come to my house and take me to school. the older i got, it became the police. nobody knew why i was refusing to go. in 9th grade, my ex boyfriend who went to my school claimed i was harassing him when i never talked to him. i was called into the vice principals office and told i was put on a 3 day suspension. that night i went home and self injured (much like most nights). i lost so much weight and i was covered in cuts and burns. my mum called the cops that night because i had finally lost control of everything and i tried to commit suicide for the third or fourth time. i ended up back in the psych ward. as i got older, the bullying from the boys at school turned sexual. i was held down and forced to do things with them late at night (i was in choir and would stay late for practice). once i got my license and my car, i started ditching school completely. i would show up for choir, then go to a park and sit under a tree and play guitar or sing. i tried so hard to envelope my life in nothing but soothing music. at home, my mother and i got worse and worse with each other. we began not even talking. it got so bad that the second she would walk into the room i would walk out no matter what. then one morning i awoke to a letter on my bed. my mum had stayed up late until i fell asleep and wrote me a letter pouring her heart out about how she felt like a failure and she regretted everything she did as a parent and how she herself felt like committing suicide because of the things she couldn't help me with. she also included that i was being pulled out of school and put into a continuation school so i could test out early. the last day at my old school, i was brought into the office again. the VP told me that an ex of mine had told her i was making comments about him and his new girlfriend (i was friends with them both and would never do that). i was told horrible things and as i got up to leave, the VP told me "this stays between me and you, right?" i proceeded to call my mum crying and telling her everything. when she tried to call the VP, she was ignored. she left a voicemail saying that she would file a lawsuit if the staff at the school continued treating me like that. i struggled through school and finally graduated at 16 years old. that was the day i quit heroin as well. i was using it to numb myself from the pain. i also made up my mind that i would no longer survive in abusive relationships. i was a victim of my own family and school mates bullying me and i didn't need the physical and sexual abuse from the men i dated either. i did everything i could to get away from them. to this day i still want to move just to get further from them and from the other people here that have caused such pain in my life. i spent about 4-5 years after graduating doing nothing, recovering, and testing out colleges. i got my own apartment and a job and things were looking up. one night while working, my manager became very forward about sexual feelings towards me. he had major boundary issues. the next night while getting ready for work, i went into a psychosis episode and my best friend (who lived with me) had to call my mum and my work and explain what happened. i was fired from my job the next day and placed in an intensive outpatient program at a psychiatric hospital. i lost my job, lost income, and had to move back home. i am happy to say that it has been two years since that and i am going to the Art Institute to become an audio production/sound engineer major. i still live with my mum and my best friend. i have a boyfriend who doesn't treat me badly. i am becoming happy with my life. my dreams are slowly coming true. i still have a long way to go with recovering from the bullying and the abuse, but at least i found my starting point. my mother is one of my best friends (though she still doesn't know much about my past) and we get along great now. my best friend is finally moving away and starting a new life like he wanted as well. hopefully one day i can do the same. until then, i will continue to put one leg in front of the other, and i will never look back on my life with regret because i know that if i didn't live through all of that, i would never be the strong, compassionate person i am today. i would never be able to say that everyone is beautiful and i definitely would never be able to live the amazing life i do now. thank you for giving me the time to tell my story. and remember, keep your head high. those that bully aren't worth your time. you are a beautiful person and you will always be able to overcome this.



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Comments
Posted By: emmabear33User Verified | 7/11/12 8:05 AM
girl, you are the definition of a true fighter even from your negatives you still manage to keep the most beautiful picture in mind and put it 1st your own self! you go girl! you are so inspiring i admire you :)
Posted By: Tinkerbella | 7/12/12 12:57 PM
You have a wonderful heart for caring for your mothers feelings like that. She is lucky to have you as a daughter
Posted By: HappyMomof4 | 7/26/12 2:02 PM
You are a sweet girl and a dream daughter
Posted By: Murray | 7/30/12 4:23 PM
You are on the right path but you will have many tough days ahead of you and I hope you believe in yourself enough not to turn back to dr*gs as a crutch
Story Details


Name: Willow Nevermore
Age: 30
Country: United States
Location: San Diego, CA
Gender: Female
Zodiac Sign: Cancer
Maiden Name: N/A
Relationship Status: In a relationship
Profession: Arts
Education level: Bachelors degree
University: The Art Institute of California - San Diego
Ethnicity: Bi-racial or Mixed
Hair Color: Blond
Eye Color: Blue
Height: 5 ft 9 in
Weight: 175
Tattoos: Yes

Chat: Enter